Mother Firefly's Faster Pussycats!

Day 4: Dexter

2011-10-06T23:36:00.000-07:00

LOVE this show. Yet to be disappointed.

Did you catch the first episode?

New favorite swear words: 'Holy Frankenfuck!'

Easily made giddy by bad words,
Mama F.

Day 3: Troll Hunter

2011-10-06T23:32:00.000-07:00

This has to be the year I've seen the fewest movies in like, ever. I saw this movie when it played the Times last summer - for whatever reason, it interested me enough to make the effort to leave the house - which is saying something. I work in the community and after spending all day in the freaking blazing heat we had all summer, it had to be something pretty stellar to get me back out in it again once I was home.

If you don't like the POV style movies like Blair Witch, Diary of the Dead, and Cloverfield, I'm probably not going to sell you on this one - but I'd still suggest giving it a chance. It's original and funny and, yes, I was creeped out more than once. A couple of reviews I read seemed to be think that the filmmakers failed by showing more of the trolls than they should have - and while I'm usually a proponent of 'less is more', I think I would have been disappointed if I hadn't seen any trolls. Maybe for some people, it didn't work, but I thought the trolls were scary and interesting enough to see more than once.

Yay for monsters back in movies!
Just a simple girl,
Mama F.

Day 2: Faust

2011-10-06T23:15:00.000-07:00

I have to mention this play before we get much further into the month. I had the pleasure of seeing it at the Alchemist Theater in Bay View last weekend, and it ROCKED. The first 15-20 minutes take place in the theater, and after that, it's all on you to see how much you want to see. You wander all over the theater watching scenes unfold with the actors only inches from you. Stand in the wrong place in the wrong time and you might just get hit by a door. Buy your tickets soon, though, as they're selling fast, apparently.

Go here to get tickets - weekends appear to be sold out but as of this writing,

Thursdays all have tickets available.

And if you don't make this production by the Alchemist, keep them in mind for

other events - they always do a great job.

Day 1: Halloween Tips

2011-10-06T23:03:00.000-07:00

Yeah, I run it every year, I'm lame, I know. But I have to give my cats the pimp spot, and this list makes Mama's lil black heart happy.

Keep in mind for Halloween, it is worthwhile to remember a few
simple rules to help keep this season healthy, happy and SAFE!!
Please use these helpful hints this and every year.

1. When it appears that you have killed the monster, NEVER check to
see if it's really dead.

2. Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.

3. Do not search the basement, especially if the power has gone
out.

4. If your children speak to you in Latin or any other language
which they should not know, shoot them immediately. It will save you
a lot of grief in the long run. However, it will probably take
several rounds to kill them, so be prepared. This also applies to
kids who speak with somebody else's voice.

5. When you have the benefit of numbers, NEVER pair off and go
alone.

6. As a general rule, don't solve puzzles that open portals to Hell.

7. Never stand in, on, or above a grave, tomb, or crypt. This would
apply to any other house of the dead as well.

8. If you're searching for something which caused a loud noise and
find out that it's just the cat, GET THE HECK OUT!

9. If appliances start operating by themselves, do not check for
short circuits, just get out.

10. Do not take ANYTHING from the dead.

11. If you find a town which looks deserted, there's probably a good
reason for it. Don't stop and look around.

12. Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you're sure
you know what you're doing.

13. If you're running from the monster, expect to trip or fall down
at least twice, more if you are female. Also note that, despite the
fact that you are running and the monster is merely shambling along,
it's still moving fast enough to catch up with you.

14. If your companions suddenly begin to exhibit uncharacteristic
behavior such as hissing, fascination for blood, glowing eyes,
increasing hairiness, and so on, kill them immediately.

15. Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are
listed here: Amityville, Elm Street, Transylvania, Nilbog (you're in
trouble if you recognize this one), anywhere in Texas where
chainsaws are sold, the Bermuda Triangle, or any small town in Maine.

16. If your car runs out of gas at night on a lonely road, do not go
to the nearby deserted-looking house to phone for help. If you think
that it is strange you ran out of gas because you thought you had
most of a tank, shoot yourself instead. You are going to die anyway,
and most likely be eaten.

17. Beware of strangers bearing tools. For example: chainsaws,
staple guns, hedge trimmers, electric carving knives, combines,
lawnmowers, butane torches, soldering irons, band saws, or any
devices made from deceased companions.

18. If you find that your house is built upon a cemetery, now is the
time to move in with the in-laws. This also applies to houses that
had previous inhabitants who went mad or committed suicide or died in
some horrible fashion, or had inhabitants who performed satanic
practices.

19. Dress appropriately. When investigating a noise downstairs in an
old house, women should not wear a flimsy negligee. And carry a
flashlight, not a candle.

20. Do not mention the names of demons around open flames, as these
can flare suddenly. Be especially careful of fireplaces in this
regard.

21. Do not go looking for witches in the countryside.... you might
find us!


Mother F.

Whether You Want Me to or Not....

2011-09-23T17:34:00.000-07:00

I'm coming back, Y'all.

It's ON, Bitches!!!!!!

-Mama

Y'all Need to Be Here

2011-03-17T23:05:00.000-07:00

in south Milwaukee on Saturday night.

From the Angry Young Men, Ltd blog:

You see, we've got a show coming up next week Friday. Char and the gang at Soulstice Theatre are throwing a benefit - One Night Only - and asked us if we would like to throw our puppets into the mix.
A little background - many of us at the core of Angry Young Men have worked with Soulstice over the last decade. Soulstice is a wonderful Community Theatre, but not in the way you'd expect. They do thoughtful, provocative, and lesser-known pieces, not another @#$%-ing version of "Our Town" starring bored suburbanites. They even donate a percentage of ticket sales, every show, to a local charity. Who else does that?
So when we were asked to 'Bring our puppets", we decided we were going to do so much more. First off, the whole of Act 2 is the NOTLD puppet show. If you missed us around Halloween, here's your chance to see us live. If you've seen us in the past, there's plenty of surprises up our sleeves for this time around.
It's never the same show twice, trust me.
We've also come up with some new characters that'll be capering underfoot during Act One. We were well overdue for singin', dancin' puppets, anyway.
So come on down to the Marion Center (3195 S Superior St, Milwaukee) on Saturday, March 19th. There'll be a Reception and cash bar starting at 6:30, and the show starts at 7:30.
Oh, and, it's Pay-What-You-Can.
So Give, Baby, Give!

Just do what yer Mama says and GIT down there.

Long Overdue

2011-03-15T23:44:00.000-07:00

While I was on my extended leave of absence, I was very saddened to hear that Ingrid Pitt had passed away. I was especially down because I was working on a portrait of her and planned on sending her a print. I was just about finished with it when I heard the news.

I really only had the background to finish - so I went for a kind of ethereal feeling.

I took this from one of her glamour shots from the 60's - I wanted to avoid the more iconic photos of her (although I love them).

I was really looking forward to contacting her again - I wrote her once about five years ago, and she was kind enough to write me back. I'm glad I did that - I just wish I'd done her portrait sooner.

I used watercolor and only blue and burnt sienna again. I'm working on a second watercolor of Ingrid, larger (this one is only 5 x 7) and not limiting the color palette this time.

EQUINOX!

2011-03-09T21:28:00.000-08:00

Equinox….a movie so great in its badness that it’s part of the Criterion Collection. Which also means it’s stupidly expensive. So rent it.

It’s about a crazy group of kids that decide to picnic in the woods, find an ancient book that is all kinds of evil ‘n stuff, and fight off stop motion monsters. Oh yeah, and there’s a castle and Kentucky Fried Chicken. Neat!

Our movie begins with some dude yelling and running through the woods and almost getting run over by a car with no driver. Then some other dude finds him and takes him to the hospital.


I agree, it's always faster to run THROUGH the trees than around them.

So, cut to a year later, and our tree jumper, David, has been hanging out in the psych ward. Apparently nobody really knows the story, so it's time to get it out of him, don't you think?

So one day David, his friend Jim, and their be-scarfed dates, Susan and Vicki get their Colonel on and head out for a picnic in the woods. Oh yeah, it also has something to do with some geology thing and a professor.

But when they get there, the professor, Dr Waterman, is nowhere to be found - and his cabin is all kinds of crazy messed up. Wonder how that happened?

But these kids aren't all alone in these woods - they have a ranger who likes to magically appear every once in a while:


Don't let my eyebrows scare you. Oh wait, on second thought, they probably should.

Not only does this forest have a ranger, it has a castle!


When forced perspective goes horribly wrong.

There's also this cackling bastard who lives in a cave:

He also gives the kids a BIG Book O EEEvil to read at their picnic.

Rockin' the KFC:

The kids learn all kinds of groovy things from this book. Including finding out what happened to the professor's cabin:

Yes, you guessed it. A freaking sea serpent destroyed it. Because, as we all well know, one of the many dangers of being out in the wilderness is the potential to run into SEA CREATURES. Oh well. In my book, that's what you get for CAMPING.

So the kids decide that this forest is just one freaking EVIL ass place, so they better make some totems to protect themselves. You know, as opposed to JUST GOING THE F**K HOME. They consult the book and get their Blair Witch on with sticks and string:


Good for keeping Rangers and Sea Serpents at bay.

So - we have A Ranger, Sea Serpents, Kentucky Fried Chicken, and Blair Witchy totems. What else could this movie use?

YES- STOP MOTION MONSTERS!!!


Forced perspective is just NOT this movie's strong suit.

So at some point, we figure out that Ranger Rick is really a bad guy, and also turning himself into these crazy ass monsters....I think.
One thing I know he can do is open up some kind of crazy portal and suck people into it:

HAHAHAHAHAHA

David can't pull Jim and the book out, so he ends up jumping in the vortex himself:

And it turns out that the inside of the vortex is pretty much the same as the OUTSIDE of the vortex.....only redder.

Then they both escape but it's soon clear that Jim is not really Jim after all.


That crazy Ranger!

Well, you know that this whole evil possession thing just ain't gonna end good, and it doesn't. Which brings us back around to the beginning of the story, with Jim flailing about on the side of the road and ending up in the nut house. Oh yeah, and Jim says something about being told that day that he would die in one year and one day. And guess what today is? Derp.

I thought I had a screen shot of Susan walking up to the hospital - with some consipicuous dark circles under her eyes. But I don't. Trust me, it's not that exciting. As almost as soon as we see her, we get this:

And that's it.
I almost feel bad for Equinox because i want to like it more than I do. Of course I mean like it in the way that I love bad movies, like I want to tuck them under my pillow and protect them from the cold, cruel world. And while there are times that Equinox veers towards Awesome Badness ( A Freaking Sea Serpent in the Forest? Be still my beating heart!), at times it's just, well, boring.

Yeah, that's pretty much how I felt by the end of this movie.

But it's fun for a one time viewing - which is why Mama would never pay Criterion Collection price for this mess. Maybe five dollar bargain bin. But I do think it's very cool that a movie like this got the Criterion treatment. So, Criterion, where's my Abby? Vampire Hookers? Death Bed: The Bed that Eats?

Oh well. We can always hope.
Till next time, friends.....go get yerselves some KFC and for god's sake, stay out of the woods.
-Mother Firefly

How Awesome Is This?

2011-03-08T22:03:00.000-08:00

Just when I think I can't love The Angry Young Men any more, they go and prove me wrong. I can't help it - when you turn one of my childhood icons into a zombie, you have my heart.

Behold the genius:

Back At It

2011-03-07T22:29:00.000-08:00

Yes, I'm back, and Mama is feeling GOOD. Finally my new place feels like a home, the cats have adjusted, and we're getting back to something resembling a life. Except since this is my strange version of a life, ghost hunting shows clog my DVR, Elvis and Barry White are on the stereo, and I tuck myself into bed at night with HorrorHound magazine. AND - best of all - The Scary is coming back around again.

Although it was never gone - I played Dawn of the Dead at least twice last weekend when I opened every last dang box in the place. Wherever I am, I always have Peter, Roger and Flyboy to keep me company.

And I've been discovering things I'd forgotten I had - before I moved to Milwaukee eight years ago, I packed up my collection of all things horror and stored it in the attic - where it's been hanging out all this time. I can't believe the things I'd forgotten - like my signed certificate from Ted Mikels saying that I'm of sound mind and body and cleared to watch The Corpse Grinders.....totally forgot I had a Lily Munster doll .... and do I really have a Leatherface bobble head? Yep. I sure do.

Finally this week I stopped working on this place and watched something filled with awesome badness and deserving of the Mama treatment. Expect that in a day or two.

The Firefly Ranch has relocated and we're back open for business, friends. Just take off your shoes, please, those rugs weren't cheap. Who needs Papa Cash, anyway? Mama is making this all her OWN.

And who knows? maybe someday, some tall drink of nerdy horror lovin' man will come over to the Ranch and say, Mama, you are some MESSED up chick.....and I love it. And I'll be all, MmmHmm, You KNOW it, Baby.

But for now, this girl is loving hanging out with her friends, doing what she wants, when she wants, and not having to watch ANYTHING that falls under the category of what I like to call 'Arty Relationship Movie'. Ew.

Take care, my friends, and Mama will be back soon with a martini in one hand and screen shots of bad monsters in the other.....

-Mama Firefly

Snowed In

2011-02-06T23:49:00.000-08:00

Or, how Mama's move was delayed by Mother Nature. Somehow I was awesomely able to time my move exactly with the biggest snow storm of the year. I ROCK!

Even with the threat of like, the hugest blizzard in the last ten years hanging over us, the movers came and they did their thing. But the snow started falling just as they finished, and by the time I got back to the old place, the roads were getting bad. Needless to say, moving the cats, getting food/supplies, and a few other things were put on hold. I spent the next day snowed in until the city got around to plowing our street, and the NEXT day locked out of my new place due to a key fiasco.

Did I mention I ROCK? You may not want me to plan your next move, however.

Then I had to work this weekend, and with the Superbowl coming (and having to reschedule the cable installation at the new place), Mama and the kitties have been living at the old place, while all of our 'stuff' is living at the new place. But not for much longer - we'll be moving the last few things will be moving in two days, along with the cats.

I'll be a few days before I'll have the net again, and then I'll be back at it. I feel all kinds of weird with all of my things gone, my movies packed away, and living out of a suitcase in the home I've been in for over eight years.

But, since I was snowed in, I managed to watch a couple things - including The Last Exorcism.

and I learned that super flexible people and blank stares are a recipe for FREAKING ME OUT. I really liked Last Exorcism for the most part - we've seen the fake documentary and we've seen people possessed by 'The DEBIL' , but I thought it was well-acted and real in a way that was really disturbing to me. Especially creepy for me was the choice to make the 'DEBIL' voice all normal like.
I was warned the ending of this was disappointing - but this movie actually has two endings - the one that fakes you out and then the 'real' explanation. When the fake out came, I thought it was lame at first and I understood the complaints. Then, when the real ending came, I actually found the 'fake' ending creepy - with the realization that 'The DEBIL' was behind it and had fooled everyone.
I didn't hate the actual ending of the movie - but to me, it felt like it belonged in an entirely different kind of movie. God knows Mama loves some good old fashioned Satan worship ( complete with an altar) in her movies, but it seemed that it belonged in a cheesier film. I thought the movie was so creepy because the documentary style filming gave the move a realistic vibe - and the ending -to me- just didn't seem to fit in with the rest of the movie. I didn't have a problem with the ending itself - I'd just like it more in a totally different movie.
So then my brother asked me how I WOULD end it - and I have no idea. But hey, Mama's a busy woman and I don't make movies, I just talk about them. It's someone else's job to entertain me, dammit.

And speaking of entertaining, I also dug Dead Set - a five part mini series from the UK that IFC played last October. Yes, it's been sitting on my DVR that long. I didn't like it as much as The Walking Dead, which I thought had more compelling characters and storylines. And Dead Set's zombies are some fast buggers, which means we get few really good looks at them and there's the kind of fast editing and jerky camera movements that make Mama's head feel all googly.

Dead Set focuses on people on a reality Big Brother type show - and what happens to them when the rest of the country goes to hell following a zombie outbreak. What I thought was great about Dead Set was exploring what it would be like if these people you'd been living with turned into zombies before your eyes - how unbelievable that would be - and believe me, in this story, it happens FAST.

Well, that's all the thoughts I have in my tired lil head. I watched the Packers win (!) and I'm SO ready to move completely into my new place and make it start feeling like home. Thanks everyone for the encouraging comments - you guys are all kinds of AWESOME and I look forward to catching up with everyone soon. And watching some crazy bad movie fill of cheese. It's great to watch good stuff but I start to crave the bad. It's true.

Until next time,
Mother Firefly

Busy, Busy, Busy

2011-01-27T22:45:00.000-08:00

The Firefly Ranch is in a STATE, my friends. Boxes and things waiting to go in boxes....I've had The Last Exorcism here for the last week and I haven't watched it yet. I'm also trying to watch everything I put on the DVR in the last couple of months - which means I've been living on a steady stream of ghost hunting shows and Destination Truth playing in the background while I pack.

Movers come next Tuesday, so Mama has her work cut out for her this weekend.......Here's hoping it goes smoothly and that night I'm kicking back in my new living room watching my first horror movie in my new home.......

Hmmm.....what I should watch first???

Mama will be getting back to business soon - I miss scary movies and I'm DYING to watch something, anything, even The Last Exorcism.

Till then -
Mother Firefly

Machete

2011-01-17T00:23:00.000-08:00

Recently I had myself a lil double feature with Machete and Black Dynamite. Cause I like my mens all rough and Grindhouse-y. It was the second time I've watched Black Dynamite but the first for Machete.

Why aren't more movies this much fun? Danny Trejo was awesome. My mom saw him in downtown Milwaukee at the last big Harley fest. True story.

I almost started it over again as soon as I was done with it. Here's hoping for more Machete.

It appears my apartment search has paid off, and I've found a new place to live. I'm moving in two weeks, so I'm going to be pretty busy packing and moving and unpacking. Posts will probably be in short supply for the next month or so until I get moved and settled.

I'll be back as soon as I can.....until then take care, and remember,
Machete don't text.

Mother Firefly

The New Daughter

2011-01-04T01:03:00.000-08:00

I almost called this post Surprisingly, It Didn't Suck. Because if this movie had somehow wandered into my home with that horrible title and the even more horrible poster:

I mean, huh? What exactly are we supposed to think this movie is about, anyway?

It makes me think 'Kevin Costner is PISSED as HELL and he's gonna take that gun and he's gonna.......he's......OH SHIT I HAVE NO FREAKING IDEA BECAUSE THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST STUPIDEST MISLEADING POSTERS EVER'

Yeah, I said it. MOST STUPIDEST.

So, as I was saying, IF this movie had just walked into my house wearing that dumbass poster, I'd have buried it under a pile of Tom Hanks movies, where I'd be sure never to find it again, because God knows I'm not going to picking any of THOSE up to watch them anytime soon. Of course, I don't actually own any Tom Hanks movies, so my threats are probably pretty empty.

ANYWAY.

The reason this movie ended up in my house was because I happened to read a review that said this movie was much better than the reviewer had anticipated. (Sorry, can't recall where that was.....) After that, I added it to my list, somehow (by the power of Kevin Costner?) it managed to crawl to the top, and then, bingo oingo boingo, it ended up here.

And the first third was pretty good, and then a bit of CGI madness managed to crawl its way across the screen. So I thought, well, okay, it was a good thirty minutes or so, maybe we'll have another good thirty minutes before the movie breaks down into a spiral of Extra Crispy Retardness.

But get this - not only did I NOT think the ending was retarded - I even thought it was CREEPY.

It may be that I am more easily spooked these days; or; it may be that this is the only new horror movie I've seen in WEEKS. Or maybe it had something to do with being directed by Luis Berdejo, the writer of [Rec].

so let your Mama know what you thought. Have you seen it, and it did you also think, Hey! That didn't actually suck! or, am I completely off base and it actually was terrible and I've just lost my marbles AND my good taste.

Until then,
Sleep Tight and Don't Let the Bedbugs Bite,
Mama F.

Long Time, no Blog

2011-01-02T22:24:00.000-08:00

Hello Dearhearts; Has it really been two months? I knew it had been a while but I was surprised to see it'd been THAT long.

A LOT has changed since I've been here last, and it's the main reason I haven't been blogging lately. Shortly after I came home from vacation, everything just came to a crash.

I graduated a year ago - and started my first nursing job - and last year started off on such a high note - school finished, making money again, I'd worked my ass off for three years and I thought now I was going to be able to enjoy all the things I'd set aside for three years while I went back to school.

Ha.

I had a brief taste of freedom and free time for a short time, and then my new job kept taking more time....and more time.....until I realized that I now had less free time then when I was a student.

Not fun.

So I made the decision that I thought was best, which was to put in a year at my new job and then start looking for something else in the new year. I made this decision because I thought it'd be better for me to at least stick it out a year, and, I needed experience as a new nurse before I'd qualify to apply to some of the other jobs I was interested in. Plus, I don't hate my actual job - in fact, I like what I do - I just don't like the 10-15 extra hours plus per week that it requires. Also - NOT getting paid overtime doesn't help.

So this seemed like a good plan, and although this job has been hell on my personal life, not to mention doing anything fun, EVER, my partner, or who I've referred to in this blog as Papa Cash, agreed with me that it was probably the best thing to do given the circumstances. He would even say to me during the hard times, when I was really down, 'It won't be forever, you just have to get through this year'. So I thought at least I had the support of my partner.

Again, HA.

But I kept counting the months down till the end of the year, I kept trudging along, I planned and went on a vacation I'd always wanted to take, and in the meantime, continued to feel burnt out, tired, depressed......you name it. I've tried to keep the bitching to a minimun - after all, there are way too many people - loved ones of mine included- who have lost their jobs in this economy and are having a hell of a time finding new employment. So at least I had a job, even if I felt like it was wrecking my health and mental well being in the meantime. I told myself to count my blessings. I had a roof over my head, money in the bank, my cats, and my significant other. Even if i had no time to enjoy them, at least they were still there.

It's funny, not very long before the proverbial shit hit the fan, I was whining to a friend of mine who sent me a short email back saying, in a nutshell, The only thing we can rely on is change.

That and she also called me Grasshopper.

I don't know if she had some sort of psychic vision about my life or what, but then that's exactly what happened. I wish I had some sort of better explanation of what I'm about to say, but the truth is I don't. One minute things were status quo, and the next minute they weren't. And ever since that single moment of realization, that second it hit me, nothing has been the same.

A couple of weeks after coming home from vacation - and maybe a week or so after my last post - I was working, driving around, doing my thing, when all of a sudden I knew.

I just knew.

And I can't tell you how I knew, or what happened before that I might have ignored, or what signs were there - I just knew. And as much as I tried to shake it off, or pretend that there really was no evidence to support it, the feeling wouldn't go away. I told myself to just let it go, that I was imagining things, that absolutely nothing had happened to support this idea in my head.

But the feeling didn't go away, and if anything, it became more pronounced as the days went on. But still I thought, this is probably all in my head, and it's more likely a warning that something may happen if things don't change.

So when I confronted him (sooner than I planned but I found I just couldn't live with this overwhelming feeling hanging over me ever second), I was still dumbfounded to find out that I was right.

My significant other, my partner of almost nine years, had decided there was someone else he'd rather spend his time with.

I think he was surprised that I knew. More surprised yet when I told him it literally hit me out of nowhere, that I had no evidence, that I had no suspicions or inklings before that day. There were no apologies, no asking for second chances, no admission that it was a mistake.
This is what was going on and this is who he wanted to be with now.

And apparently my epiphany, as correct as it was, was a few months late in getting to the party, as this had been going on for a while.

He went on vacation with me. He let me pay for a vacation with him. We even talked about planning our next vacation in the spring. We kept living our lives and I kept working my ass off and counting down the weeks till I had my year in so I could look for a new job. I wonder when he would have told me?

So - I spent a few days feeling numb, then going through every emotion in the book trying to process, trying to explain, trying to decide my next move. Finally, I decided staying in Milwaukee (at least for the time being) was best. And, as much as I hate to admit it, changing jobs in the near future is probably not going to happen, as looking for a place to live is taking precedence at the moment.

I even thought I had a place, briefly, but it didn't work out - which depressed me even more - and with the holidays approaching I decided to wait a few weeks to start looking again. I'm glad that the holidays are over - they weren't fun, as you can imagine, and it was the first Christmas ever that I've spent alone. Add to that watching your ex pack up and go spend the holidays with his brand new 'family'.

Yeah. Good Times. And if Christmas and New Year's weren't fun enough, I also had a birthday nestled in between those as well.

I know. I can't possibly get much more pathetic.

Then in the last couple of weeks I got a couple of presents from my BFF, KK, which reminded me that if I'm going to get back to something that resembles the old me and try to put together some sort of new life for myself, then I have to hold onto to the things that keep me sane- my friends, my cats, my art (mostly on the backburner), and last but not least, my love of The Scary.

First, a GORGEOUS book; trust me, if you like Hammer, this is all kinds of yummy:

And this morsel of cinematic goodness, one of my personal faves and which FINALLY has a REAL release with special features -

It's time to start dragging myself out of the pit of sadness/pity/inertia/anger and the only way I know how to do that is by getting back to what I love. And getting this movie for my birthday reminded me that even though I have a lot left to do, I need to start taking time again to feed my soul and for your old Mama, feeding the soul means getting back to The Scary again. Many things have changed in my lifetime, but at least one thing has always remained constant, and that's the way that The Scary makes me feel.

Normal. Sane. Comforted. I know that doesn't make the world's most typical woman, but guess what - Mama doesn't give two shits anymore. Maybe, in the end, that's what PC wanted - a more 'normal' woman. He certainly never expressed an interest in my passion, including this blog. Which is why I feel pretty free to say whatever the hell I want - he never read it before, and if he's just starting now, well, then, too freaking bad.

So I'm sitting here tonight, watching Hellboy, reveling in the awesomeness of Ron Perlman and his huge noggin..

maybe it just shows how f**ked up I am that I think this movie is a ROMANCE

...getting ready to go back to the grind for another week, and trying not to think of all the change that's still coming and everything I still have left to do. But I suppose, even though I'd like to see it wrapped up by oh, next week? the truth is that it's going to take as long as it's going to take, and all I can do is let it unfold.

I hope there are still people out there that haven't completely forgotten about me...and I'm looking forward to catching up with the blogs that i love.

And, BTW, I haven't forgotten about the contest and mailing out the prints. I will be getting that done this month.

Here's to a better year in 2011 and here's a little song with a message I'd like to pass along to those it applies to....the genders may be different but hey, if the shoe fits....

My God I Heart This Man

2010-11-07T18:43:00.000-08:00

Pictures -Finally

2010-11-07T17:40:00.000-08:00

Just wanted to let everyone know that the pictures are all finally downloaded and I added some to three of the older posts.

Also, if you are into the paranormal thing, take a look at my brother's blog, Project Blue, and his review of a new documentary about some scary places in Saginaw, Michigan.

Hamilton Street Horrors

And tell him I said to write more because I get sad when he doesn't.

Trail of the Screaming Foreheads

2010-11-07T13:19:00.000-08:00

I found this by accident on IFC when I was setting up the DVR for 'The Dead Set' last week. I remember reading a little about this but I'd forgotten about it - a quick search of Amazon found that it's not available on DVD, so I added it to my DVR. I watched part of it last weekend and then finished it up on my sick day - which took three or four attempts because I kept falling asleep. I attribute that more to the illness than the movie - although it does kind of drag in the middle.

Screaming Forehead is a tribute film to the scifi films of the 50s - the Earth is being invaded by alien foreheads from another planet just looking for a decent place to live because well, their planet just isn't working out for them so well.....and isn't that always how these things tend to go???

The director of 'Foreheads', Larry Blamire, is behind Lost Skeleton of Cadvara - which may just be the best tribute film of this kind. Unfortunately, I don't think Foreheads is anywhere as good as "Skeleton', but it's still fun. The actors do a great job, and just like Skeleton, the appreciation and love for the genre (and the era that these films came from) shows.

Possessing a certain sense of humor helps to find a movie like this appealing. For instance, if you're a fan of certain movies where completely un-dangerous (is that even a word?) items suddenly possess a dangerous side, then you might enjoy Foreheads. For instance, if the sight of tomatoes chasing people across parking lots makes you laugh*, then alien Foreheads inching their way across the landscape will probably be your cup of tea as well.

This was fun but I'm looking forward to Larry Blamire's other films,

Dark and Stormy Night

and

The Lost Skeleton Returns Again

Both of which are available on DVD right now.

For other films of this kind, I also recommend the films of Christopher Mimh. Last year during the Countdown to Halloween, I reviewed a couple of his films as well as Cadavra and a couple others along the same vein. You can go relive my retardedness here and here, and here, if you're so inclined.

Mama F.

* (and yes, it does, quite frankly)

Joe Hill

2010-11-04T10:44:00.000-07:00

I stayed home sick today; and I'm barely making it through with a steady diet of juice, Harry Potter, coffee, movies about foreheads from outer space (more on that later), and this.....

tada...........

This is not a new book - it was published in October 2005. But I just bought it recently to read on the plane and finished it up today. Hands down, one of the best (if not the best) collections of short stories by a single author that I've ever read.

If you aren't already aware, Joe Hill is the son of Stephen King....although I'm pretty sure you won't see that mentioned anywhere in the introductions or on the covers of the book. I don't think he admitted a connection to his famous father until his second book Heart Shaped Box, published in 2007, came out. Which is another book I highly recommend.

The author also has a new book out, called Horns, and a comic book series called Locke and Key that is going to be made into a TV series. If I wasn't so under the weather, i could probably be bothered to look that stuff up, lol.

Young Frankenstein: The Musical

2010-11-03T19:28:00.000-07:00

I'm off today - and a little under the weather - but I did want to mention that we saw this in Milwaukee last night:

I'm a HUGE YF fan - it's my number three favorite movie of all time- so I was really looking forward to this. I thought they did a great job overall - and I was really impressed with the way the three main actors : Victor, Elizabeth, the Monster - managed to make the parts their own. Of course all the iconic lines are still there - but just like Spamalot, I felt that the best parts weren't with the lines you already knew - but with the songs and the new material that the actors had to work with.

Overall, better than I expected. I think I would have liked it regardless, but I thought the sons were great and the cast top notch. I recommend it if you have the chance.

One Last Post Halloween Blast: Zombie Puppets, Nekkid Ladies and Double Feature Halloween Morning Slam

2010-11-02T00:50:00.000-07:00

The last few days of October were a blast.

Thursday the 28th I was fortunate enough to see the NOLD: TPS at The Oriental. I'm happy to report it was very well attended. The audience responded with a well deserved standing O.

I took a friend who is not a fan of horror movies and has never seen any of the Romero films - and she loved it.
That, guys, is how much you ROCK.
Can't wait to see where you show up next.

Saturday I made my way over to The Times Cinema to take in what may be the definitive horror comedy, Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein.

This film is also on my Halloween list of movies I must watch every October. Also a very well attended show. This movie never loses its funny to me - I'll never get tired of the 'Oh Chick, Oh Chhhhhhhhhhhhhickkkkkkk!!!!!!!!' bit, and I always lose it when Costello starts calling the Frankenstein monster 'Junior'.

Then I came home for a nap, and later Papa Cash and I went back to the Times for a raunchy and randy (but fun) show by The Brew City Bombshells. I'd wanted to see their show before but never made it - Holy Crap, the fun I've been missing.

The Bombshells come in all shapes and sizes - and all chose Halloween themed costumes and songs to strip to. Mixed with the Bombshells were performances by The Dead Man's Carnival. For a woman whose lil black heart truly is warmed by go-go dancing from the 60's, this was a show that rocked my Halloween.

Unfortunately I can't find the gnarly cool poster they had for the Halloween show - but here's an advert featuring the upcoming Christmas show at the Times. And believe me, girls and boys, Mama will be there.

And finally, my Halloween morning - I have a 'Must' list of films that I love and need to watch every October. I'd already watched House on Haunted Hill earlier in the month, and Abbott and Costello the day before - so I got up early Sunday morning and managed to get in a couple before football started.

My double feature consisted of:

(which is a new addition to my list)

and

'cause it ain't Halloween if Tom Atkins isn't in there somewhere.

I thought I did fairly well for spending so much time away from home this year and being so dang busy. Other films that I usually like to watch are:

Young Frankenstein (although I am seeing the Broadway musical version tomorrow night)

Bride of the Monster or Plan 9 From Outer Space

Mad Monster Party

The Howling

and I'm sure there's others I'm forgetting right now.

So it was a pretty event filled October - if not a great one for blogging. I will be going back to my favorite blogs, however, and catching up on my favorites and am looking forward to everyone's October adventures.

And - I SWEAR TO GOD pictures really are forthcoming. I did manage to download some pictures on another computer - although mine have still not made it yet. I have completely given up on using my laptop to accomplish this anymore. Mama needs a new computer for Christmas.

AND- to all three of you who entered the contest - Guess what, I've decided to just give you all a print. Thanks for taking the time to enter. Jinx, please post your email in the comments - I won't publish it - and the other two I'll be emailing you for your addresses. JL, I'll need your address as well because I don't know if I have the most recent one. It'll take me a couple weeks to get them mailed out - I have a jacked up work schedule coming up - but you all should get them by the end of November.

I hope everyone had an outstanding Halloween - here's to finishing the rest of the year happy and healthy-

Mama Firefly

Day Twenty Four: Islands of Adventure:, or The Harry Potter Experience

2010-10-31T23:30:00.000-07:00

As I said in the previous post, I'd never been to Islands of Adventure before.

I am a Harry Potter fan, and I was really looking forward to this part of the trip. This part of the park opened last summer, and it's still very popular.

We went on Sunday and again on Monday, thinking that Monday would be the slower day - which is exactly what everyone else was thinking, apparently. We ended up not spending a lot of time there because it was so damn crowded. Instead, we spent our day having lunch at the Mykonos cafe and watching a talking fountain mess with small children. Good times.

But we did get to see most of it on Sunday. We didn't ride the dragon rollercoaster, but we did go on the main ride - and hands down, it's the best ride I've EVER been on. Yes. Best ride EVER. Bear in mind the P. Cash did not think so - he thought it was a very well done ride, but is not a fan of rides that are simulated. This ride is part roller coaster and part simulation, and I absolutely loved it. I used to ride EVERYTHING when i was a kid, but I've found that I don't enjoy anything that goes upside down anymore or things that have really steep drops. Yes, I've become a huge pussy. True Story.

Once the newness dies down a little, and a bit fewer people aren't making from pilgrimages all over the world - it'll be a great place to spend the day. We did manage to eat at Three Broomsticks, try some Butterbeer (yum) and do most other things but for the most part, getting around in the stores and in the streets was slow and required a good amount of patience.

We also went to the Sinbad Stunt show that day - and big hint that I'm ready to go home at this point - fireworks are going off around me, men are swinging from the rafters, water is spraying every where, and I'm sleeping. SLEEPING.

Oh HELLS no that BEEYOTCH in the front row is not gonna sleep through MY show

I also managed to pack a couple of other scary incidences in the trip that I didn't even have to pay extra for.

I woke up once in the middle of the night and managed to get my legs over the side of the bed - I'm assuming I either needed a drink of water or to use the bathroom - but I never got any further than that. Instead, I apparently fell back asleep sitting up on the edge of the bed - and if that wasn't freaky enough, I also woke up rocking back and forth slightly. Just my own little version of Paranormal Activity. I couldn't get back in bed fast enough.
I also found out that our bathroom floor at the hotel was massively slippery when wet - and almost did a huge wipe out all over it after the P Cash forgot to warn me about the water all over the floor. Thankfully I caught myself and only jammed a thumb - accompanied by the rest of my vacation flashing before my eyes - one of those moments when you just know without a doubt that you've just avoided a trip to the ER.

So I managed to pack a few scares into the trip that I didn't even have to pay extra for!
And that's my last October post - but I've got about three more posts I'd like to do regarding how I spent the last couple days of the month featuring zombie puppets, burlesque, and how I packed my favorite movies of the season in.

It was an unusual October for me - I didn't do about half of the normal things I usually do for the month - but I did get to do something that I've wanted to do for at least the last ten years. I'm glad I did it and it was worth it - but I also enjoy my regular traditions and I kind of missed them - even though the tradeoff was worth it, and I think I still got enough of my usual thing to have it feel like Halloween - even if for about a day or two.

I'll also add pictures to these posts - and announce the winner of the contest.

Mama F.

Universal Studios

2010-10-31T23:06:00.000-07:00

I miss King Kong. I do. I found out shortly before we left for our vacation that the King Kong ride was no longer a part of Universal. I don't know when they took it down - I'm pretty The Mummy roller coaster took its place - but I was really bummed to find out I wasn't going to be able to ride it and I had a little bit of nostalgia when I came out of The Mummy and realized that it used to come out into the King Kong themed store - and unless I'm crazy, there was a place you could pose for a picture inside Kong's hand. The Mummy ride was fun, but it would have been great to be terrorized by Kong again.

I was at Universal Orlando about fifteen years ago - and only about a half dozen of the rides and shows were the same. Also, Islands of Adventure wasn't even there - I remember the signs for the upcoming Jurassic Park ride - so this was my first trip there.

But Universal still has Jaws - fun, although it's showing its age- the Beetlejuice show, and the Horror Makeup Effects Show - which is a lot of fun. Even the P.Cash agreed that it was one of the best things at the park.

Cuttin' on Grandma.

The Monster Cafe is still there - it was closed down during the day and open during HHH - I'm not sure why, since they didn't do anything special with it at night. I did go on purpose and had a soda, just so I could see inside and hang out. There was an old horror movie playing on the screens and there are a few old movie posters. When I was there years ago, Frankenstein was wandering around, doing his thing.

The Alfred Hitchcock movie/interactive experience and the facade of The Psycho House (why??????) are gone, as is the Ghostbusters show. There are some other changes, but those are the biggest horror related ones that I noticed. I loved Universal the first time I went, and I still think it's a great park. I was just disappointed to find that so many things that I enjoyed the first time were gone.

Halloween Horror Nights

2010-10-31T22:49:00.000-07:00

The first scary thing I encountered in Orlando happened before I even got in the park - and that was trying to figure out what tickets to buy and in what kind of package. I ended up buying a frequent fear pass for HHH - which meant we could have went any Wed, Thurs, or Sun during the entire run. A more expensive pass was available that included Fri or Sat nights as well, but since everything I heard and read prior to going said the weekend nights were crazy, we decided that we'd avoid those nights.

I couldn't even buy tickets before we left because the whole thing was so confusing that I got paranoid that I'd buy the wrong thing for the wrong times - but a very nice and experienced person in our hotel was a huge help and steered us in the right direction. We also bought a four day pass to Universal Studios/Islands of Adventure, since it was only an additional $5.00 to upgrade from a four day to a three.

I'll talk more about Universal in another post - and the horror related things they have during the day - every day of the year - at the park.

HHH had six haunted houses, six 'scare zones', two live shows - in addition to a handful of regular rides that were open. I would have liked to have ridden Jaws at night - but it really took us all of two nights just to do what we did.

Since Grandma Firefly is the Queen of HHH - she goes every year - I took advice from her and also paid the extra $$ for the fast pass - which allows you to skip ahead of the lines - and believe me, even on a Wednesday night, they were amazingly long. However, most of them said a half hour wait - if that's true, I can't imagine how long they were on weekend nights. So we focused on the haunted houses that first night, which were spread over the park.

It took pretty much all of that first night to cover those houses - we didn't see any shows and missed most of the scare zones so we could take advantage of the fast pass and see all of the houses.

One of the houses was a tribute to the first 20 years of HHH - this one was jam packed with all kinds of great props and while it looked really cool - this was the last house I made it to, and, honestly I was too exhausted to really enjoy it. I wish I'd started on this side of the park and went the opposite way.

Out of the other five, there was one haunted house called The Orfanage (sp) that we thought did a good job on creating a creepy ambiance using props, music, sound effects, and costuming.

Otherwise - I thought the haunted houses were all very similar - and an awful lot of walking to keep repeating the same experience over and over.

However, the scare zones were a lot more fun - and we literally spent hours in them, hanging out, having a drink, and watching the actors do their thing. Zombie Gras was probably my favorite - and I really do have some pictures - I'm just having a terrible time downloading them.

Zombie Gras had a float sitting off to one side, mardi gras music playing, and it was as the title suggested - Mardi Gras given over to the walking dead. Zombie musicians, partiers and more than a few dead clowns stumbled around, growled, played with body parts, and terrorized people walking through.

Other scare zones had an area where monsters from years past and present (representing the last twenty years) wandered around and terrorized guests. One particular monster - a pig demon guy dressed in overalls - decided he'd make me one of his personal favorites one night. On the second night I was there, I went through this section about three or four times, and every time I did, this guy would stop what he was doing, point at me and then stalk me for a while.

Yes, he is pointing at ME.

It's kind of funny considering the week before we went to Orlando, the P. Cash and I were driving around Milwaukee late at night, looking at houses for sale, and drove by one that I remarked looked like 'Jodi the pig demon was probably sitting up there, rocking the night away in her little chair'. Of course he didn't get it, but anyone of a certain age will probably get that reference from the original Amityville Horror. At this time in my life, I think the Lutzes were probably running more from a mortgage they couldn't afford, but the idea of Jodi the pig demon in her rocking chair will always give me the heebie jeebies. Add to that seeing Motel Hell at an impressionable age, and you've got enough to have Mr Pig Demon Dude stalking me to make me more than just a little freaked out. So thank you, Mr Pig Demon guy.

The costumes and the actors that were in the other scare zones -a creepy, dark, foggy area filled with witches both ugly and beautiful - and a kind of day glo Day of the Dead -did a terrific job. And if you don't like being chased by men with chainsaws, well, then consider yourself warned- because that is one thing that the park definitely doesn't skimp on - and when I can not only download my own pictures, but access P. Cash's as well, I'll showcase some of my favorites in all of these places.

I also enjoyed the Bill and Ted's Adventure show - more of a comedy thing making fun of pop culture and celebrities - and the Magic show. Had I known that the Magic show featured two different shows, I would have went to both. Unfortunately, I didn't realize this until we actually saw the show - which was the last one we could attend.

All in all, I'm glad I finally got to see and do this - I was slightly disappointed in the haunted houses - I think I'd have been fine with maybe just going through half of them - but I also realize that Universal has to get people through these houses fairly quickly - and so that limits what they can do and how interactive they can make them. The big houses I used to go to in Flint as a kid were long (they took about an hour to go through them) and also followed a storyline and used lots of actors and made you completely stop in certain rooms so they could terrorize you and bring you into the story. These lines are amazingly long as it is - if they slowed down the amount of time it too to go through them, people would spend most of the night in line and not get to see a lot of the park - which would be very frustrating considering you're paying one price for everything.

And - unless you're young, full of energy, and walking all day and night doesn't tire you out, it's REALLY tough to go to the park all day and then go back and do HHH till midnight. So pace yourself accordingly. We only did two nights - although we could have done another one with the pass - it was the same price as buying two nights individually, so we didn't lose out on any money - AND with the pass, we were also able to choose which night to go back.

Here's a short video on YouTube showcasing the scare zones.


What you see just before they get you.

Update on Contest , Zombie Puppets, and Pretty Much Everything Else

2010-10-27T18:48:00.000-07:00

Hi, we're home and I'd really LOVE to post some pictures from my trip - but once again my computer does not want to cooperate and download anything.....so hopefully I'll be able to use another computer to get that done so I can get to some blogging.

I'd also like to change the rules of the contest - due to, ahem, really low response - if you want to enter, then just leave a comment in that post. Or this one. Or whatever. Believe me, at this point, barring some major onslaught of entries - you've got a pretty good shot. So in that vein, if you really don't want it - don't enter, because chances are good you'll end up with it. Lol.

I have a lot to say about my trip and what was good (and what wasn't) and I think we got some good shots of the festivities and the parks.

I don't want to go back to work, but I am glad to be home. I missed my cats and my Autumn Wisconsin weather. We had a long hot summer and I was all, 'Enough already with the sunshine and the hot and the bright already!'. I just wasn't far enough away from summer yet to appreciate it.

I am hoping that I can make this a yearly tradition and seek out some new Halloween Haunt every year to try - when I was a kid - and we lived far away from EVERYTHING - we always made excursions out to other places in the state to go on haunted hay rides, Haunted houses, you name it. I'll talk more about that when I blog about the haunted houses.

When I moved to Milwaukee, I thought I'd be in seventh heaven, finally living in a big city around Halloween time - but the truth of it is - we seem to have a dearth of good Halloween options in this town. Unless I'm just looking in the wrong places, the things I have tried are just well, okay. (With the KILLER exception of the Night of the Living Dead Zombie Puppet Show going on tomorrow night, of course!). I did find a great haunted asylum a few years ago on the South side but I haven't seen them since so I'm assuming they never reopened.

Last year i watched the Travel Channel's specials on the Best Haunts in America - great specials that made me want to visit all of these places around the country. I also found out that the Detroit area has the most haunted houses/attractions in October per capita (or something like that, anyway, there's A LOT) so that probably accounts for my disappointment upon moving to Milwaukee.

I wuz spoiled.

But - there is a great website on America's Best Haunts - and I'm happy to say that Wisconsin did make the top 20 this year - although this place is not in Milwaukee. It may, however, end up being my Halloween destination next year.

Wisconsin FearGrounds

And here is the promo for the NOLD:TPS at the Oriental tomorrow night. Can't wait!!!!

Also a very cool article can be found online here

Day Nineteen: We Made It

2010-10-19T21:53:00.000-07:00

And I'm kind of surprised.....there was about ten minutes when I was sure we were going to miss our flight. As much as I planned for this, there's always things you can't anticipate - and a couple of those almost waylaid us too much.

But we made the flight -and of course, the advantage to running behind is that you don't have to wait to board or to take off.

And hey, if you don't mind the panic attack, high blood pressure, and headache that go along with it, I wholeheartedly recommend it as a way of travel.

We also made a last minute decision to rent a car, went to the wrong hotel, and of course we only had two hours of sleep last night. Which meant:

A) By the time we made it to the right hotel, it didn't make any sense to go Universal today; and

B) By about 330 pm I was completely and totally exhausted - a feeling which was accompanied by the distinct sensation that I was leaving my body. It was simultaneously scary, giddy, and kind of interesting all at once. I napped for a couple hours and woke up feeling like I was oriented back into the mortal coil again. Of course, that wore off, and I'm verging on crashing in front of this - so I'm going to sign off for now and sleep.

We did manage to eat lunch at a great Chinese place while we were waiting for our room to be ready, and had a nice late night dinner at Fish Bones a couple of hours ago.

Other than that, we've both just been napping and trying to prepare/map out our plan of attack for the week...I'll post as I can and hopefully there'll be more pictures. Unfortunately there were none today since I didn't want to add anything new to my camera until I was sure what was on there was going to come off.

Have a great Wednesday - even though I thought I was going to float away today, it beats the HELL out of work. So freakin' glad to get away.

-Mama F.

Day Eighteen: Contest!!!

2010-10-19T20:48:00.000-07:00

Well, evidently I had to travel about 1200 miles away from my home to FINALLY be able to get some time to post on my contest.

My computer in Milwaukee refused to download my photos, but my notebook is actually behaving very well here in Orlando.

The prize is a print of a watercolor painting I recently did:

I apologize for the quality - I had to photograph the painting (and didn't do a great job) since I don't have a scanner.

I've never seen The Brain Eaters (1958) and apparently, it's not available on DVD at the moment. But I needed a black and white photo for an exercise in my painting class, and when I found this, I used a black and white version to create my own version. I would never sell this, of course, since it's obviously just an art exercise using someone else's work - but I can give a print away.

I'm also considering using this technique to create some original work - but of course time is a huge factor - and while I'm still at my current job (please, Jebus, not for too much longer!!) then that may hamper my efforts.

The exercise was to paint this picture using only two colors. I cheated a little bit and put a touch of pink and yellow in it. But the rest of the painting was done using only two other colors.

To enter the contest, you can do one of two things:
1) Guess which colors I used and guess correctly - I'll take very generic color names. Pink and yellow do not count, since I already named them, obviously. I'll also tell you that 'white' is not an answer - any white on the painting is just unpainted background. But you have to get both correct, which gets you an entry into the contest.

2) Post a link to my contest on your blog and post that link in the comments.

Do both and you'll get two entries in the contest. I will then draw one winner from those entries.

I moderate the comments, so I won't be posting them until I pick the winner of the contest on October 31st.

*As I mentioned in a later post, you can enter the contest just by leaving a comment. However, either guessing the correct colors or posting a link will get you additional entries*

Good Luck!
-Mother Firefly

Day Seventeen: Delays

2010-10-18T00:18:00.000-07:00

Well, as good as Mama's intentions were and as much as I tried to plan in advance, it turns out that working 50 hours a week, planning for a vacation, and trying not to lose my damn mind are not very conducive to blogging every day. I've been sort of bummed about it - I did manage to blog every day last year and I had a blast. I was even in graduate school last year - so imagining that I'm even busier now then I was then is kind of sad.

But I can't get too down - because this year I get to do what I've wanted to for YEARS and that's go to Universal Studios Horror Nights in Orlando.

I'm going to attempt to blog from down there - they may be short posts but I'll try to do updates as I can - providing the Wi-fi works well and I can wrestle the lap top away from Papa Cash.

Wish me luck.

I was also going to start the contest tonight, but I'm having HUGE technical difficulties, so I'll attempt again tomorrow to download what I need to download. Also I'm discovering in the last week that Mama REALLY needs a new computer.

See you tomorrow,
Mama F.

Day Fourteen: Ghost Adventures

2010-10-17T23:13:00.000-07:00

I've talked about my love for the Ghost Hunter guys many times, especially on my other (neglected) blog, Old Spooky House. But I'm not the only nutcase responsible for that blog, so I can at least do the American thing and blame other people for it. (Hee)

Who were also here in Milwaukee last night, and I wasn't there.....sigh....just too much going on recently.

I've also talked (or drooled) about my crush, Josh Gates, from Destination Truth, on that blog as well.

I've got a destination for you, Mister......It's called MAH BEDROOM

I think, however, I have neglected to mention these dudes very much - and maybe it's because I'm slightly embarrassed to admit my fondness for this show. Then I realized that it totally belongs in my huge stack of other guilty pleasures, like Road House, Showgirls, American Idol, and any VH-1 show that features slutty drunk women competing for some washed up recording star. (What happened to those shows, btw??)

These dudes, my friends, are my guilty ghost-hunting pleasure.

I heart ghost hunting shows (I even have my own K-2 meter - all the ghost nerds will know what I mean) and I can't say I would recommend the Ghost Adventure guys methods, or even that I believe all of their results. (They find something every single time????)

But there is something that is so all-fired craaaaazy about how they go into a completely dark place, get locked in, and start calling the ghosts out. And these dudes don't even stop there, they invite the nasty stuff, the demons, the what have you, to get up all in their faces, and at least one of them has to fight off a mini- possession at least every other show.
And I don't even think I believe in that stuff.

I know - it's the National Inquirer version of paranormal research. And I'm sure that what they do makes the other guys who have a more systematic and well, reserved, method of research want to hold their heads and cry.

But there is something about watching these three get locked down, even though you can pretty much predict what will happen. We have our 'Oh Chick, Chick-Chick-CHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK' guy who provides the scared reactions(Fans of a certain comedy team will get that one), we have the guy who's kind of in the middle as far as reactions and provocations, and then we have Zach:

I can't decide if this guy is sexy or just insane.....or maybe both.

Who likes to yell and intimidate the ghosts into giving him paranormal evidence.

Then someone has to fight off possession.

I don't even BELIEVE in possession. (I believe more in the influence of our own minds) but I can't say I secretly hope that one of these times, Zach's head will spin completely around and he'll spray green vomit all over his compadres. Which will then cause the poor man's Lou Costello to cry and pee his pants simultaneously.

As silly as this show may feel at times, it's still more entertaining than the slew of remakes and sequels in the horror genre - at least you get some good spooky stories and history before their lock downs - and they do often revisit places they've gone to before. They also have some of the weirdest equipment out there.

So if you're home on a Friday night and have nothing better to do, tune in the Ghost Adventure boys and watch Zach and his crazy hair yell at dead people in the dark.

Boo,
Mother Firefly

Day Thirteen: Dark Candles

2010-10-17T04:33:00.000-07:00

As I said a couple of days ago, I started using scented oils instead of candles. One of the best places I've ever bought oils is Dark Candles.

Not only do the bottles look great and have fantastic artwork, the oils smell AMAZING.

A few of my favorites are Dracula, Corpse, and Haunted House.

Day Twelve: Society of Eclectic Halloween Artists Blog

2010-10-17T04:09:00.000-07:00

Check out the contest here at the Society of Eclectic Halloween Artists Blog

All you need to do is go to their blog and enter in the comments section. You can also post about the contest for an extra entry in the contest.

This is one of the cool things you can win:

Day Eleven: Bat Scentbug

2010-10-15T00:58:00.000-07:00

Just when I was doing so well......work came along and a few long days have totally knocked me off my schedule. For two nights in a row I've fallen asleep in front of my computer trying to work on Halloween posts. But TGIF, and I have a few things planned including Mama's first ever CONTEST! I'm hoping to get caught up before we leave for vacation next week, and then post some things from Orlando....provided the Wi-Fi we're supposed to have works correctly.

Anyway, here is one of my Halloween purchases this year:

It's from Bath and Body and they also have new scents for October like Autumn, Caramel Apple, Pumpkin Patch and Autumn Apple.

I stopped using scented candles about a year ago and switched over to oils. I usually use a warmer, but this one runs on batteries and a fan - the scent isn't as strong as the warmer, but it does a fairly good job in a small space. The scent was strong enough to make my cat gag, anyway. Nissa (Miss Glowing Eyes from Day One) is also Miss Sensitive (to food, strong odors, and change of any kind) and gags (yes, actually gags - it'd be funny if it weren't so pathetic) when she smells things like coffee, perfume, and now, Autumn Apple, apparently.

That's a great advertising campaign for Bath and Body -
Scentbugs....scents so strong they'll make your cats gag!

Plus, it's a bat!

See you tomorrow......
Mama F

Day Ten: Go Shopping

2010-10-11T21:55:00.000-07:00

Go ahead, treat yourself. You deserve it.

Deep Discount's Horror Sale

Day Nine: Rifftrax: House on Haunted Hill

2010-10-11T21:07:00.000-07:00

I heart House on Haunted Hill. It's one of the movies I watch every October.....so I thought I'd do the Rifftrax version this year. (BTW, all the Rifftrax discs come with the regular non-Rifftrax version of the film as well).

The Rifftrax version had its moments - I've only seen three Rifftrax films, with Plan 9 From Outer Space being my favorite so far. I'd have to put HoHH in 3rd place - just as MST3K had some movies that lent themselves better to the format than others, the same is true with these films.

I think that maybe this doesn't work quite as well because House on Haunted Hill is actually a good movie. Sure, there's moments to poke fun at, but to me, this is maybe the best William Castle film and one of my favorite Price films.

Also, we have the delectable Carol Ohmart:

She and Price are all kinds of scrumptious. I wish they'd made at least one more film together. She's also amazing in another one of my favorite films, Spider Baby.

Still, in the set that I bought, the Rifftrax films came in at under five bucks each - that, with the original version of the film, is a pretty sweet deal. Otherwise, if you're considering buying some of these at full price, I'd hold off for a sale unless you don't already have a copy of this film and you are in all kinds of love with Mike Nelson. Then go for it.

PS
Happy Birthday to Mike Nelson. Apparently he turns 46 today - I had no idea until I read The Halloween Blues tonight.

Day Eight: Black Devil Doll

2010-10-11T20:34:00.000-07:00

what can I say about Black Devil Doll? It's on par with Thankskilling - with titles like these, there's really only two responses. Either you're rolling your eyes and wondering how our culture could stoop so low (in which case you're probably not reading this blog) or you're all, HELLS YEAH WHERE DO I SIGN UP????

I think you know what side Mama F falls on. Yes, the side with the extra cheese, please.

Black Devil Doll begins with a killer being put to death in the electric chair - a killer responsible for murdering several women.

Meanwhile, a young woman with big boobies and nothing better to do decides to play around with an Ouija Board:

And wham, bam, before you know it, we have.......Black Devil Doll.

For a while, things go okay between BDD and his new lady love. We know this because we have a montage showing us how in love they are.

Tell me, who doesn't love a montage - especially one that features a large breasted woman playing with her puppet boyfriend at the park? But eventually BDD gets bored, and tells his woman to bring her friends over, because he needs something new:

Except BDD has more in mind for these chicks besides lovin' (although he does that too, in just about every way you can imagine)

Make no mistake, BDD is made to offend - it's sleazy, it's nasty, and it's also hysterical.

A couple of posts ago I mentioned that I waited months on an order from Deep Discount - and this movie was the one I was most pumped about. It didn't disappoint - it was just as nasty, tasteless, and as funny as I expected it would be. Another bonus - a track you can play with the movie featuring the audience reaction at a screening. I thought that was great, and I'll definitely watch the movie again with that playing. There's also a commentary track featuring Black Devil Doll, but I haven't checked that out yet. Should be fun.

Day Seven: The Undertaker and His Pals

2010-10-10T21:41:00.000-07:00

I woke up Saturday morning craving a cheese-tastic horror flick, and for my money (and short attention span), you can't do much better than this little film:

With a runtime of just about 60 minutes (!), Undertaker wastes no time getting to the red stuff:

We have Sally Lamb, sitting at home, writing a letter (presumably to sailor boy in the photo on the table)

When she's attacked by three men in leather and motorcycle helmets:

Even sailor boy can't believe it:

Turns out her attackers only want parts of her body.....hmmmm.

Sally Lamb is laid to rest at the local funeral home:

Apparently they opted for the Divine funeral with the ever-popular 'Eyes-Open' feature

And her parents are incensed to find out that the $144.98 funeral they were promised is going to cost much, much more than that (thanks to all the 'extras' that were tacked on).

Meanwhile, a local detective decides to take his secretary out for lunch at a local dive:

And it's only pointed out about a dozen times during this scene that the special is 'leg of lamb' and that a woman named Sally Lamb was murdered recently. You know, in case, REALLY REALLY slow people are watching the movie.

AND - the secretary's name is Miss Chicken, so you know she's probably not long for this world:

As her boss and other police are investigating her murder, our slimy funeral owner shows up to sell his famous $144.98 funeral - well, the cost before any 'extras', of course. But the detective fills out the contract bottom line for 144.98 - and tells the funeral owner no 'extras' are necessary.

And then then the slowest detective on the planet goes back to the restaurant to miss out on more huge clues:

In case any of this isn't completely obvious, the three killers are all profiting from the murders - with the restaurant owners serving up the murder victims, and the funeral owner making money burying the 'leftovers'.

I like Undertaker - it kind of has an HG Lewis / David Friedman kind of feel, but with a purposeful tongue in cheek attitude.

After all, a movie that has pie fights:

Vats of acid - which are labeled 'ACID' so as to avoid any confusion:

And in what HAS to be the funniest scene in the movie (although I can't tell if this one is on purpose or not), the killers make what has to be the SLOWEST escape ever out of window after being walked in during a murder.

Then, after they've literally taken their sweet time getting away, one of the women runs over to the window and pulls out a gun in the table nearby -

What ensues is the strangest, most hysterical bad dubbing of a gun firing that I've ever seen in my life - complete w bizarre hip thrusting by the young woman with the gun.

Oh, and BTW, this is what a $144.98 funeral looks like:

The insanity is worth the price of admission - and btw, you shouldn't have to pay more than a few bucks for this movie. Mine cost a whole DOLLAR when I picked it up a couple of years ago.

Wink-wink,
Mama F.

Day Six: Rifftrax: Reefer Madness

2010-10-10T17:13:00.000-07:00

Sometime early last summer, Deep Discount ran their semi-annual 25% sale, and I ordered a Rifftrax box set of 10 movies, along with some other things. DD sent me half my order, and the rest was backordered....and backordered.....finally last week the rest of my order - which was this box set and a handful of other movies, arrived. (I think DD kind of wanted me to forget the order - they kept sending me emails saying they hoped to send it out in a couple weeks, but that I was more than welcome to cancel the rest of the order if I wanted to. I'm all, uh-uh bitches, I want my cheap-ass movies. I'll wait.)

It ended up coming at the perfect time - there's a couple October favorites in the mix. But I started with Reefer Madness - somehow or another I have managed to never see this movie, and I thought it sounded like fun.

Reefer Madness wasn't quite what I expected - for some reason I thought it would have more of a documentary type feel - but Mike Nelson and co. made for an enjoyable funny evening. Otherwise I think this film would be interesting as a time capsule type of thing, but I don't think it's anything I would watch again.

Rifftrax isn't quite Mystery Science Theater - but it's fun and in some ways, less intrusive than MST - fewer jokes and no silhouetted forms covering the screen. Not that I mind that during MST - this is just a different format.

Last fall I went to a local theater to see Plan 9 on the big screen with the Rifftrax experience - in that format they frequently cut away to the Rifftrax gang live in the theater, doing their thing. This format is quieter, more intimate - it's almost like having a couple of funny friends along to watch a movie with you.

By the way, I see Rifftrax will be doing the same thing this year with House on Haunted Hill - and I was set to go until I found that it was the same evening as the NOLD Puppet Show - and I think you all know where my loyalties lay in that regard.

Yeah, boyeeeeeeeeeeeeee, I'm gonna go see zombie puppets at the Oriental that night.

Day Five: Awesome Halloween Box

2010-10-09T19:07:00.000-07:00

Okay, so it's technically day 9, but Mama had a hell of a week, so we've got some catching up to do. Never fear, I've been slavishly watching movies all day just for your benefit (I'm so selfless) so I'll be posting my reviews and other Halloween themed things I've discovered in the last few days.

One nice thing that happened yesterday was the delivery of a package I wasn't expecting (don't you love that!) from Grandma Firefly.

What I got was a little Halloween care package courtesy of Hallmark:

The Dancing Frankenstein was inside the cool Halloween box, that screamed when I opened it.

Neato!

A nice way to end a long week and a great start to my self imposed Hermit style weekend. It's my last one before I need to pack for my trip, so Mama is putting her feet up and indulging in movies that all kinds of bad for me....including one that's probably bad for everyone....but in a good way.....more on that later.

Boo,
Mama Firefly

Day Four: Krypt Kiddies

2010-10-05T21:09:00.000-07:00

I think anyone who has hung around the Firefly Ranch for any length of time knows that Mama likes creepy dolls. I'd have a hard time topping the creepiness of Sam from Trick R Treat (currently haunting my bedroom) or my Zuni warrior from Trilogy of Terror (hanging out in the living room) but I think one of these could give them a run for the money:

Check out Krypt Kiddies -

Not only do they have some jacked up baby dolls:

They also have some CRAZY looking clown dolls.

If you really want a treat, go to the website and look at the custom made babies.

Day Three : Buried

2010-10-04T21:18:00.000-07:00

This was the finale for the Milwaukee Film Festival last night.

All I knew about this movie going in was:
Ryan Reynolds.
Buried Alive.
Cell Phone and Lighter included.

I highly suggest if you're going to see this - and it opens in wide release next weekend - that you avoid knowing much else. I think letting the events unfold in front of you (vs going into the movie knowing who he is, where he is, and how he got there) will make for a much richer movie experience.

Buried is not a fun movie to watch. I'm glad I saw it, I'm happy I saw it at the venue I did, but it was NOT an enjoyable night at the movies. And I'll never watch it again.

How's that for a recommendation?

Creeped the F**K out,
Mother Firefly

Day Two: Blood Junkie

2010-10-04T20:43:00.000-07:00

The Milwaukee Film Festival finished up last night, and I was at the Oriental for the finale. Every year the Festival shows ONE horror movie, and I always manage to see it, and their choices are usually good. In previous years I've seen House of the Devil, Severance, and The Signal. So this year I opened up the catalog to find my ONE horror movie, and holy crap.....there was one.....and two....and three......FOUR, count 'em, FOUR genre movies.

Except.

I couldn't make it to two of them.

Sigh.

Blame bad planning and totally spacing on the dates for the festival and neither myself or Papa Cash taking any time off for it. I don't know what changed this year, MFF, but I like it. Do it again. Mama says so.

Anyway, one of the films I saw was Blood Junkie.

This little treat was filmed in Wisconsin, and it's a kind of 80's flashback "Let's Go Into the Woods and Get Ourselfs Kilt" deal. The write up in the catalog compared it to Evil Dead, but I'd put it more in the realm of movies like The Forest and Don't Go In The Woods.

Blood Junkie reminded me of the kind of thing you see at Horror Conventions, a movie that goes down better with an alcoholic beverage and a bunch of genre fans looking to have a good time. I don't know if it would be as much fun watching it alone in my living room - where I watch most of my horror movies.....but it's still better than a lot of low budget fare out there - or than a lot of the movies with a budget ten times as big (or more). It was an easy on the attention span 75 minutes, and the film did a good job of making it look like the 80's all over again.

Website for Blood Junkie here.http://bloodjunkiemovie.com/

Day 1: Halloween Tips

2010-10-03T20:21:00.000-07:00

*This is actually a repost from last year......but it's one of my favorites, so I thought I'd start off the season with it. I didn't write it - and I'm not sure who did. I added the pictures, and a couple of my cats were happy to help out with the Halloween Tips. Okay, maybe not THAT happy about it......