What do you get when you cross Loretta Swit, motocross, Peter Fonda, a couples' vacation, a cute puppy, and a decked out RV with all the trimmings, including a full stocked bar? Yep, you guessed it - you get SATANISM.
I don't know why the DVD didn't use this great poster as cover art instead of the cheesy collage of photos they slapped on the cover, but whatever. The poster suggests that this is some kind of RV racing action film, but its not. Which is good, because I would A)not spend five bucks on a RV action film, or B)review it on my blog. But lucky for you, I would spend five bucks on a 70's RV Satanism film AND review it on my blog.
The motocross thing is actually pretty incidental - besides it being featured in the beginning of the film and once in a friendly race between Peter Fonda and Warren Oates, it's really not that important. What IS important is Peter Fonda's shag haircut:
Do you think Kristy McNicol stole it from him or vice versa?
Anyway, the two couples set off for vacation in their kick ass RV, complete with all the trimmings:
Dog not included.
They have a friendly motorcycle race and then later that evening notice that there's a big bonfire on the other side of the river. Of course, the fellas need to take a closer look.
They decide that it's just some dancing and chanting, no big deal. No, really, take another look:
Yep, just friendly dancing.
Finally these morons (seriously, have they never left the house?) figure out that maybe what's going on across the river is BAD and they shouldn't be WITNESSES. When is exactly when Loretta Swit decides to start yelling at the guys to come in - and then the party across the river knows they're being watched. Peter and the gang hurry up and pack it up but not in enough time :
I couldn't get a good screen capture of the satanists jumping on the RV (with capes on!) but the lady who isn't Loretta Swit and her puppy are REALLY, REALLY SCARED:
They head straight to the local law to get some help and end up going back to the site to show them where they saw the sacrifice. At this point in the movie, the plot becomes really transparent and you get a sense of exactly where this movie is going.
don't they look like nice, decent, helpful policemen? Uh-huh.
They find an area that looks like blood, and the cops take a sample, but they're pretty sure it's just from some animal or something - nothing to be all concerned with, people!
Meanwhile, Loretta and not-Loretta find a piece of paper jammed in their broken window with a bunch of weird letters and symbols on it. They have no idea what they could mean so they decide to investigate at the local library.
Turns out that it's runes and witchcraft and spells and evil 'n shit. (They're about as freaking vague -not to mention the completely WRONG definition that runes are used as 'evil spells'- as they can POSSIBLY be with their research)
So they leave town (with a blood sample of their own to have tested somewhere else)
but not before they stop at a gas station so this guy and his cat can fix their window.
(Oh, I'm so not kidding about that part)
and end up at an RV park with the most annoying neighbors ever.
And this is why I don't go to RV parks, people.
Of course, shit goes down at the RV park, and they end up feeling it's not such a friendly place after all. More hi-jinks follow, such as finding that someone has stocked their RV with two pissed off serpents:
I'M FED UP WITH THESE MOTHER F**KING SNAKES ON THIS MOTHER F**KING RV!!!
And the rest of the movie pretty much continues this way, with the Satanists trying to kill them and Peter and the gang really never knowing who to trust. I'll save the 'shocking' ending that the DVD box advertises (although you can really see it coming the whole time).
Bottom line is, if you like RVs, Satanists, and Loretta Swit, this movie is custom made for you. Or - if you enjoyed the cheese fests called 'Devil Dog' or 'Devil Times Five' (starring a very young - and murderous!- Leif Garrett), you will freakin' love this. I had fun, I laughed (where I wasn't supposed to) and I didn't even need a martini to make it go down smoother.