If you, like myself, are old enough to be....well, of a 'certain age'.....you may have also grown up with three channels (sometimes four if the wind was blowing the right direction and you could convince your brother to stand next to the TV with one hand on the bunny ears and one foot off the ground), and changing the channel meant also turning the big dial on the floor behind the TV and waiting for the antenna on the roof to turn and listening to the whirr -whirr -whirr sound.......
If any (or all of it) sounds familiar, than you may also be familiar with something else that's also went extinct along with the above mentioned fossils.
I'm talking about the 4 o'clock movie.
Or 5 o'clock, or 6, or whenever. Back in the days when Donahue was the only talk show host (OMG I am REALLY dating the shit out of myself now), local TV stations used to fill Monday through Friday afternoons with movies. And more often than not, those movies ran in themes.
We had Planet of the Apes week, Godzilla week, Elvis week.......and every once in a while, we'd have Killer Animals Week. Yeah, now you can tune into Discovery channel for Shark Week and watch the real thing do well, shark things......but back in the days of three channels, we had movies with killer rats, bees, locusts, and frogs.
And while I can't be sure whether or not this particular film ever made any of the 4 o'clock Killer Animals movies, it's tailor made to fit in with those others.
I'm talking about, of course,
NIGHT OF THE LEPUS.
And yes, as the title of my post would suggest, Night of the Lepus is jam packed with...
Giant Mutant Killer Bunny Rabbits.
Do I really need to review this movie? At this point, you're either rolling your eyes contemplating the crapdom of such a storyline, or you're all, WHERE do I sign up to see such FABULOUSNESS such as this????
If you are in the latter group, then come along, friend, and let me take you on a tour of highlights of the deliciousness that is Night of the Lepus:
SPECIAL REPORTS that warn us of the terrible, terrible things that rabbits can do if left to their own devices:
I'm pretty sure Bugs Bunny fought during this:
Take the time to read the part at the bottom:
Yeah. It was an actual BOOK first.
Haircuts provided on the set by the Robert Goulet Traveling Barbershop:
Hey, let's get that new 'young couple' that's in town to come and fix our bunny rabbit problem!
Of course, by 'young', I mean 'AARP card carrying', and by 'fix', I mean 'create behemoth killer rabbits'
Let me take the time to explain how our scientific experiment works so you can screw it up real good:
Just like that.
Hell hath no fury like.....
mutant rabbits on a lettuce bender.
One broken mannequin leg + 3M Dawn of the Dead type blood = AWESOME.
God, I miss hot rollers.
Gimme some carrots, BITCH!!
Bunny Stampede in the mine!
Bunny Stampede on the ranch!
God help you if you see THIS in your rear view mirror:
When Bunnies Attack!!
Callin' in the big guns:
Dead Lepuses : (okay, use your imagination)
Everything must be okay now:
Or not.
God bless the 4'oclock movies.
-Mother Firefly
10 hours ago
2 comments:
OMG! What a memory you have! I had forgotten all about them but loved them so much! If only they would do something like that again. It would be so much better than Dr Phil or any of the goofy people trying to fix all the problems of the world like finding out who is who's father and crap like that. Just sitting down everyday and watching some of these old fantastic films would solve all the problems of the world. I know it and you know it too. I totally forget your problems and know that there are bigger problems out there like giant rabbits or even Elvis's love life. That is the way to wind down after a hard day. We need things like this to straighten out the kids and adults of today.
Amen, sister! That is what I'm trying to do with my blog - introduce people to the TRULY fantastic films.
This is the perfect time, since Oprah and Tyra Banks are calling it quits, to
A)Bring back the 4 o'clock movies, and
B)Bring back Phil Donahue. (he can be on the other station)
Besides, now that we have DVR, we can watch them both.
Imagine....a world with the big PD and an Elvis fight on in the same afternoon. LOVELY.
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